The beer is cheap, but the manager convinced me I needed to get an arranged marriage.

Chase Hutchins

The beers were too cheap and the staff enabled my drinking problem

Helen Eastman

The first thing I noticed when approaching "Valhalla" was the strong fetid smell of spoiled beer. The door handle was incredibly sticky and I swear there was some days old vomit in the entry way. The bar was full or the mind numbing chatter of disturbingly uninteresting people and a bar tender who couldn't possibly be more unhappy to see me and continually berated me about the fact that I didn't bring cash, something I haven't carried since I was a child trying to buy a candy bar with quarters. The beer was overpriced and had an odd taste to it like the smell of a truck stop toilet. Would not recommend to anyone who likes to enjoy the experience of drinking.

John Hill

Always cold. Always crowded with people wearing sandals. Music is picked out by blind throws at a dartboard with Now Thats What I Call Music for 5 year olds. Also, hope you like blown amps and the static from flannels being worn every day of the year

Marcus James

I’m a senior citizen and the only good thing about this sub-terranean dive, is that it’s cash only. I stumbled upon this place while driving through West University looking for a rest home. Pulled into the only un-gated parking lot around and had to park next to a dumpster. Walked around a bit and found this building with an arch shaped door which I opened, only to find stairs leading down into a cellar they call “Valhalla”. It’s certainly not Happy Acres, but the beer is better here.

Jim Peschel

Bartenders may as well be working for free with an attitude they give here. Cash only! What are they think this is 1989?

George West

Came in looking for a steakhouse with a decent table Caesar salad service and an extensive wine cellar. Was shocked...shocked I tell you, to find out this is a cash only (are we in the Middle Ages?) college dive bar serving cheap beer and wine. Horrid!!!

+2

Mike G.

The beers are affordable & cold, the staff are nice & friendly, and the environment is laid back. I will be back.

Luis Rojas Aguilar

i asked for a tame impala song and they told me to sit and spin also their sour beer was sweet and their sweet beer was sour… very confusing not sure what’s up with that

John Tran

Would give this place a negative 5 if such a thing existed. Came here expecting something cool as was described by some alum friends..What a disappointment . The bar tender , David or something , practically scowled and barked at me … buy the hype, also, it smells a bit like unbathed architecture grad students…

Daenera Vazquez

If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to drink in a crypt while being scolded by a medieval librarian, this place is your answer. The music? Gregorian chants. Nonstop. As if the vibes weren’t already cursed enough, the bar is cramped, musty, and crusty—like it’s been sealed in a time capsule labeled “Do Not Disturb, Ever.” There’s a giant book of history literally chained to the bar, and the chain constantly clanks against the floor or your leg like a passive-aggressive ghost. Every now and then, someone behind the bar launches into a random lecture about obscure historical events no one asked for—think “Drunk TED Talk meets detention.” Don’t even think about skipping the tip. The bartenders will shoot you a look like you just insulted their entire bloodline. Save yourself the trip unless you’re really into medieval punishment with a side of stale beer.

M

If you like warm, flat, and overpriced beer, this is your bar. Wouldn’t come back unless I had to. Maybe if the beer was free. Otherwise, decent staff.

William Salazar

They say this place is Valhalla? More like Hellheim. Not a place I would consider having a good time at. All the drinks are way too expensive and beer is beyond flat. One of the bartenders saw me and would not stop yelling at me to repent for my sins. I simply could not recommend this place at all whatsoever.

Ben Love

I don't normally leave a review for bar, but this place was so bad I felt the need to warn everyone. DO NOT GO! You would think I would love the place since they often pour the awesome beer from Gigantic Brewing, my brewery, but no - the beer is sold for too cheap, the people there are too smart and interesting to talk to, and the vibe of the place is old.. it was built in the 60's or 70's and people smoke there - well they did for years I mean, not any longer though. Plus they have a large hammer they make you hold, and that makes my bicep hurt.